Out of all the questions we receive, this definitely ranks in the top 3.
Back when I was in college, I dated a guy for over 2 years. We loved each other, and on most occasions things were going “pretty good”. As our relationship progressed, I turned to my mom and asked- “How do I know if he’s the one?” She replied, “He’s not. When you meet the one, you won’t have to ask”. As we fast forward several years later, V came back into the picture out of nowhere. After just 2 months of dating, I told my mom that he was the one. She smiled and instantly reminded me of our conversation years prior. I didn’t have to ask her. God told me and V proved it.
While no relationship is perfect, here are the top 5 things that confirmed that he was the one.
1) God said so. Not to get all extra deep, but we fasted and prayed together and God revealed that this is who I needed to be with. You’ve got to be on one accord. You BOTH must seek God and ask for direction for your relationship.
2) His desire for Christ. Let me keep it 100%. Although we were both saved, I was more spiritually advanced when we reunited. What drew me closer to him was his desire for Christ. He didn’t just talk about it; he followed his words by reading the bible, praying and fasting more. God has truly developed him to become my spiritual leader.
3) NO sex. We made it clear on the phone and discussed it again on the first date. We weren’t sexing. Since we were both on the same page, there were times when he was weak and I was strong and vice versa, but your commitment will keep you from falling. In my eyes, if he can wait for sex, God showed me that he has the fortitude to stand by me through trials.
4) What did you say about Kiona? We faced a situation and he stood up for me, defended my name and made sure I was at peace. Women must feel secure with their men AND men must be able to lead.
5) Family First. My aunt died unexpectedly and I don’t think I’ve faced so much pain. There was nothing like having him care for me throughout several disappointments. God showed me that he would not only be a good husband, but also a good father. I could go on and on, but I will leave you with this… When it’s right, you will know. You won’t have to beg, plead or issue ultimatums for your Mr./Mrs. Right to marry you. They will willingly do so. No excuses. No exceptions.