One of the best things about growing up was watching my parents’ marriage. I know that no relationship is perfect, but watching them interact made me love “love”. From observing their marriage, I NEVER understood how and why people would cheat on their spouses. Since my childhood, God has given me the desire to be a wife, and I knew that I would have a ministry supporting marriage.
During my earlier years of college, I was more focused on partying than living for Christ. I grew closer to my co-workers and partying because a weekly ritual. One of my co-workers was married and he constantly asked me out on dates. He complained that his wife was inattentive and didn’t fulfill him sexually. While I was not living according to God’s word, I knew that I could never become involved with someone else’s husband. When I kept denying his requests, he eventually began “dating” another co-worker. One afternoon, his “inattentive, non sex-giving wife” came in to bring her husband lunch and she was six-months pregnant. *confused* How did she become pregnant if they weren’t having sex? *side-eye*
Unfortunately, this is just one example of too many! *sigh*
I couldn’t possibly count the number of emails or messages we receive from women who are “dating” married men, so I had to address this topic. Here’s some advice- Married is married AND separated is still married. This is NOT to judge you, but you need to be informed that you deserve better! When you trust God’s plan, you will love yourself enough to know that what He has for you is for you. Things to consider…If you truly believe that your husband is coming, then why would you “date” someone else’s husband? If this person really loved you, why aren’t they married to YOU? How would you feel if the roles were reversed?
There is no nice or politically correct way to address this topic. If you are the “other” person, you need to remove yourself from the situation. Remember, that God doesn’t bless what He didn’t ordain. Despite how bad it hurts or how much you want to stay, you owe it to yourself to leave.
You don’t deserve to be someone’s first or main lady, you deserve to be their ONLY!